Chainsaw Failure

Chainsaw Failure 

This post was written during my college years at Michigan State, timeless information.

Failure is like a chainsaw. If used the right way it can help to create a very beautiful ice sculpture, if used the wrong way, well… It can kill you. It wouldn’t be a pretty kill either. As college students we experience failure in some kind of shape or form at least monthly. Whether it’s a bad grade on a quiz, on a exam or even  just homework, we have experienced it before. These failures, although significant are not the failures I am talking about.

Chainsaw failures are failures that involve attending college, completing four years and failing your last class, and then forced to dropout because you ran out of money. Chainsaw failure is like being kicked off the high school basketball team for “lack of skill” ( Michael Jordan). Chainsaw failure is like being told ” you are too stupid to learn anything” by your teacher in elementary school ( Thomas Edison). Finally, I hope you are getting the picture, chainsaw failure is like having grades so low that your teachers tell you ” you will never amount to anything” ( Albert Einstein ). The list goes on, Abe Lincoln, Walt Disney, Oprah Winfrey and most well known people have experienced what I call chainsaw failure.

You may be wondering what prompted this blog post. Well, just today (November 9, 2010) I experienced what I feel to be a Chainsaw failure. It all started when I applied to teach for America (tfa). The interview process started with a essay which I reluctantly submitted because I was not wholly convinced that tfa was for me. After weeks of waiting I received news that I was accepted to the next round. Then I had my phone interview which I felt I didn’t do well on. A few weeks went by and I received news that I was accepted to the next level. Excited and elated, I immediately prepared for the final interview. After weeks of preparation, finally came the final interview. Needless to say, I thought I did a excellent job. Throughout this process I did everything to get my hopes up (which I do not regret).

Anybody who knows me, knew that I applied to Teach for America and was very excited about it. I visited the website almost daily looking to the future of being a Teach For America corps member. I watched just about every testimonial of former and current Teach for America corps members. I knew that I would be accepted. My wife was excited too, my love wanted to live in Houston for two years.  We even celebrated early and went to dinner. My parents, mentors, friends, coworkers, and teachers knew what I would be doing after graduation.

Then comes the email. Say hello to chainsaw failure. I must admit the initial blow was devastating. I had checked my email at least thirty times before. Sitting in class on my iPad (thanks @Eric_jorgenson) I read the email and suddenly a tennis ball came to my throat (good thing I sat in the back). It hurt. All of the preparation flashed before me, all of the people who I told that November 9th was the day. It hit me, and for a second I wanted to turn the chainsaw on and cut my neck off with self destructive self talk, better yet drop out of school. Luckily I had been taught on failure by various mentors, books and CDs. All of the information came up and suddenly I was overcome by a strong “fire in the belly”. I have never been so motivated to succeed.

This day has been life changing for me. I may have failed, but I still have the chainsaw.  I will be taking that letter and hanging it up on my wall (nothing against Teach for America), and as the greats such as Michael Jordan, Oprah Winfrey, Thomas Edison and others, I will turn the chainsaw on to create a masterpiece of success in life.

And as you continue on your journey, I hope that this post can help you when you encounter your very own chainsaw failure. Learn from it, grow from it, let it motivate you but never let it kill you because “what doesn’t kill you will make you stronger”.